A lot of people have asked me why you can’t sue Unicorns. Here is the back story. Names have been changed to protect the guilty.
One cold wintry day, two federati are talking about people making unreasonable demands as to what should be included in a policy statement:
Federati1: I want federation operators to supply me with a white horse, pony or donkey so that I can dress it up for my “federations powered by Unicorns” campaign (but I don’t think it will happen).
But it is as useful as all the other suggestions.
Federati2: Now unicorns i’m all for investing in.
Federati1: The Purple Federation would probably find the budget for a pony.
Federati2: we can glue on a horn.
Federati1: That was my plan. It’s only marketing after all. Although they’ve probably got the budget for a real Unicorn.
Federati2: I’m in. As long as I can dress up in a conical hat.
Federati1: Clearly only princes and princesses can ride unicorns. It’s not like you’d let the policy say more than that!
Federati2: no [rude word] way.
Policywonk1: [interrupts] It only says that Princes and Princesses SHOULD ride unicorns. I should be allowed to as well.
Policywonk2.: You have to sign the insurance waiver form in English. It says that it SHOULD be in English – but I think it should be changed to MUST be in English.
Federati1: “Unicorns can’t read – they just want to frolick through the air. It doesn’t matter what language the insurance waiver is in. YOU CAN’T SUE UNICORNS.
Policywonk3: “Because Welsh law still recognises the original KJV of the Bible – unicorns can be sued in Wales”
Federati2: So no one objects if I ride my unicorn-pony dressed as a princess as long as I don’t do it Wales? ???
LESSON1: Don’t ride Unicorns in Wales.
LESSON2: Never engage in a battle of wits with someone who writes policy….or Sicilians.